Feb 23, 2008

Peace, patriotism and the art of politeness

Guest Opinion

By Kriss Worthington

For the record, I voted against the Berkeley City Council motion authorizing a letter to tell the Marine recruiters they were unwelcome and uninvited intruders in Berkeley. I also made the motion to rescind that vote and to apologize for it. Since I am a lifetime activist for peace who has been arrested and beaten up while protesting for peace, some wondered if I was caving in to the right-wing pressure. Instead I would suggest that my position offered the best chance for intelligent, effective advocacy for peace.

When I was little, my foster mother taught me about apologies. She said an apology can't undo the harm, but it can let people know you didn't mean to hurt them, and it might even lessen some of the hurt. This was her lesson to me after I accidentally knocked over a "house" built by my foster brother and occupied by our foster sister in the backyard. When I stumbled and bumped into it, I didn't even know that the collection of sticks and twigs and weeds was a "house." But John was screaming and Melody was crying, so I knew something was wrong. Mother quieted us all down, made me apologize to both of them, and got me to help them rebuild their "house." With her help, we managed to put it back together and even make it bigger and better and harder to knock down.

So what do childhood memories have to do with Marines and CodePink and the recent actions of the Berkeley City Council?

Since I know all the members of the Berkeley City Council, I am certain they did not mean to insult our veterans and the people risking their lives in the military today or their friends, families and supporters.

The council members who voted for the original letter that caused the hurt feelings simply thought this was one more way to say "no" to an unpopular and illegal war. Unfortunately this well-intentioned goal stumbled and bumped into a perception of insulting the reputation of the Marines and all the military. I believe it was an innocent accident, and no one intended this to be taken as an insult to our veterans and our military. But just as my foster mom taught me, no matter what your intentions, apologizing may well be the best course of action.

Berkeley still has opportunities to let people know we didn't mean to hurt them and even to lessen some of the hurt. Just as I apologized after Mother explained the need to me, there is still time for the city council to apologize.

Additionally the city council has an opportunity to turn the phrase "we support our veterans" into action. Local veterans used to meet in the Berkeley Veterans Building, but in recent years, they have been told they cannot use their traditional space because of seismic safety concerns.

Veterans learned that other people are now meeting in their traditional meeting space, and are currently seeking access for monthly veterans meetings.

Just as my foster mom turned that childhood accident into a positive lesson and an opportunity to come together and create a better building, perhaps we can turn this trial into a triumph and show our local veterans we really do care and are willing to prove it through our actions. This could be a healing moment for us all.